So, You’re Trying To Quit Watching Porn?

I am really encouraged by reading this blog post to quit my own porn addiction.


So you want to stop watching porn? Maybe you read my first posts. Maybe you didn’t ready either of them. That doesn’t matter at all. What is important is that you’re here. You’re reading this because you want to stop feeding your addiction that’s holding a grip on your. That’s is a very bold decision and I’m proud of you for it. I’m here to tell you that it won’t be easy, but I’m here to offer my help along the way. I’m interested in your journey, because someone was nice enough to take an interest in mine and it changed my life forever. Let’s do this!

I was in your shoes not too long ago. Just a few months actually. Now, I am 63 days porn free! I don’t write this blog to brag. I write this blog to be transparent. I’m 19 and have spent over 6 years…

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You don’t need to be rude

One of my friends lashed on me yesterday on a joke which I cracked on him with words which he should have not used. I was baffled why is he talking to me like this for no big reason. It was a lame joke which anyone could take on him/her self happily. While he was being rude to me and saying things he reminded me of a past incident where I made fun of him and he got offended, but he never told me and kept bottled up for the right moment. He said rude words to me now because he wanted to make me realize how he felt that time

Quite often all of us do the same when we get offended by someone. Instead of standing up in front of them to say that we did not like what they said/did or we were hurt and felt unhappy, we bottle up our anger for the right moment to pay off. I felt very sad for myfirend that he had to do that because of me and I am really sorry that I didn’t realize that I was offending him before. But now when I think about it, I feel none of us need to be rude or bottle up our anger waiting for the right moment to tell others that we got offended once. To me, it’s being cowardly and not being courageous enough to speak about ones feeling.

I have learned from my bitter experience in the past that it’s always better to be upfront with people you interact with. If I like something about someone I try to go to him/her and say it and it is the same with if I do not like something that someone did or said to me, I try to make sure that I convey them myself in a polite and respectful manner. I do not feel right to bottle up my anger for later use, because it not only come out in a very ugly way but also it troubles me till it’s inside me. I also feel that my friendships give me the right to speak about my feelings openly and I do not need to be rude to them to let them know that I am not happy about something.

Makeup-less March

Mandatory Ramblings of A College Grad

Let me preface this by saying I don’t have anything against makeup, in fact I honestly think makeup is really fun to apply and a great way to show creative expression. However, it seems like so often today girls feel like it’s a necessity to wear it in order to look their best. Let me tell you right now, you do not need makeup to look beautiful. You are beautiful as is. That’s the simple truth right there. (See even Ryan Gosling Agrees!)

Many girls fall into a habit of applying makeup so frequently that they begin to believe they look dull or plain without it. I started falling into that habit when I worked for a make-up company over winter break a few years back. I never understood why some girls felt the need to consistently wear make-up. Before working for this company I was a weekend make-up girl…

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Porn, sex and twitter!!

Similar to my previous experiment on finding incestuous culture among people through IRC chat channels, I did another experiment to find out how popular it is to use twitter for porn sharing and sex chats. To be honest, initially I joined twitter with a fake account to follow some porn stars. I always had this curiosity to know what they talk about in their day to day life. So I followed some famous and some not so famous porn actress and sadly the only reason they use twitter is to promote their movie release or to tell people when they are coming online for cam chat or when they are performing in a strip club or that they are tested for STDs and can be booked for movies. I found following porn actresses as the most boring experience on twitter. The only porn actress who talks about anything else than when she is getting fucked is Mia Khalifa @miakhalifa.

After getting disappointed from porn actresses I tried to search what else I can find if I search for sex or porn. Interestingly, I bumped into many users with Indian or Pakistani names with a popular word “Bhabhi” in many accounts. These people, presumably with fake accounts are there for sleaze chats, porn pic and animated gifs exchange. I followed around 400 users and shared tweets with pics attached to many of them. I also chatted with personal messages with few of the “Bhabhis”. In Hindi this word means the wife of your elder brother and for some reason in India it can be used in a very naughty way. So all these women are married and are either not happy with their married life or are just looking for some extra spice by anonymously talking to strangers. There were a few accounts with very submissive females who want others to abuse or call out names to them. Most of the tweets sent to them were written using English alphabets but with words from different language presumable Hindi or Urdu.

Some of the popular and very active members I remember were:

@rekhabhabhi @bhabhi_pooja @bhabhi_for_u @madhu_bhabhi @SabaBhabhi @SlutPreeti @chhamiyarani @hema_patel87 @komal_bhatiya @kuttiyaruta @priasen24 @sexipreeti @simran20521 @sissy_candy @randi_aisha @gpinky091 @hottie_simmi86

These experiments have really shown me a very different side of Indian and Pakistani cultures. When it comes to sex, openly they do not appreciate the idea of promiscuity, pre-marital sex or casual sex, but secretly they do fantasize about these things and the internet has given them a way to let their heart out. Although the number of people I followed on twitter is negligible in comparison to the population of these nations so drawing any conclusion for the whole country will be pointless. But considering the low literacy rate and the lack of opportunity to use web technologies for everyone, does indicate that there might be many more with similar ideas whom we can never know about. Anyway, I think these things are there in every community and country around the world, in some cultures they are more open and acceptable in others they are not.

Struggle for Hindu Existence! Hilarious :D

Reading about the recent controversy going on in India about a hate statement given by the RSS top leader Dr. Mohan Bhagwat, against the service of renowned and Nobel Prize winner for Peace Mother Teresa, I bumped into this website This post is not about what Bhagwat-Teresa controversy was but it’s about how ridiculous I found this website is.

What I figured out while reading a few articles on this website is that it is like a news bulletin which talks about how threatened the future of Hinduism or Hindus are in India. Most of the articles are either anti Islamic or anti Christianity. Anti Islamic because they either report a Muslim involved in some kind of vandalism (as the whole world think Muslims have only one thing to do) or they are planning to do something vicious against Hindus. Anti Christianity because they think all the Christians have a sole agenda of their life to convert more people into Christianity. It does not matter whether a Christian person or a Christian organization is charity related or education related (which as a matter of fact, many of the best education hubs and charities in India are run by Christian churches and missionaries) they only provide service so that they can convert more people to Christianity.

I got intrigued to find out how the population of India is divided among various religions. Referring to the Census of India Website I found a PDF document which reveals that Hindus are in majority with 80.5% of the total population, followed by Muslims and Christians with 13.4% and 2.3% respectively.  I got really puzzled that how come Hindus who are in majority with much more than 50% margin are struggling for their existence. Then I realized that probably it’s not the struggle for survival, but its the struggle to gain more and more power by few top leaders of the Hindu extremist organizations. As nowadays the best way to make people support your agenda is to tickle their religious sentiments.

The main agenda of these organizations is to make India a nation only for Hindus and bring back the original Hinduism. I doubt that anyone actually knows what original Hinduism was because this religion follows many books and uncountable number of Gods. In my opinion bringing back original or former Hinduism is not a good idea for India because it will also bring back the setbacks associated with the staunch Hinduism such as caste system and practice of Sati. India is a becoming a future superpower not because it is standing on its religious extremism, but because it is still the largest democracy where people have shaken off and continuously getting rid of discriminations based on caste, sex and religion. People in India are still free to have an opinion without being threatened by the extremist organizations. But giving in to the powers of such organization in the hope of bringing back the old culture will only bring more adversaries than good. Culture is what people build, and it should be to help the humanity to unite one another, to love one another and to grow for the common good. Aggravating and dividing people on the basis of religion as only destroyed nations throughout the history.


I enjoy chatting on IRC more than, for example chatting in one of the Yahoo chat rooms, it has many more channels for various interests and I personally find fewer fake or bot accounts. In those plethora of chat channels there are many dedicated to sex chats and to my surprise there are quite a few channels for chats related to Incest behavior.

So I decided to do an experiment and chat with people in those channels for a few weeks. So I joined channels like #incest #familysex #dadanddaughtersex in DalNet and UnderNet networks. I personally believe in straight post marital sex, but I was really surprised to talk to people who are not only into promiscuous behavior outside but also within their families. And to add to my surprise most of the people in the #incest channel were from Pakistan. A country so conservative, with a religion so strict, has such a culture going on. Although thinking about it from another angle Islam does allow marriages between cousins, so they are into incest of some definition, but sex between father and daughter or between immediate siblings is just too much for me. If you do not trust my words then connect to DalNet and join #incest channel and you will find 90% of the people are from Pakistan.

I also talked to a young married woman, according to her she had slept with her dad, granddad, two of her nephews apart from her husband. There were many people in those channels who were just there for role playing and that they are not incest in real life. But to me even thinking about having sex with one of my family members is so awkward and sinful.

I asked one of the girls I was chatting to, is that allowed in a country like Pakistan and the answer was yes, probably not openly, but people are involved in such things. Again to me its a double standard of the Muslim community, at one side, they project themselves to be so holy and God fearing and on the other hand they are also involved in such things. I understand that we all are humans and are equally likely to fall into temptations and sins, but it’s also important for us to accept it and repent from it. Or atleast don’t point the fingers on others when there is so much shit going on in ourselves.

Muslims what is wrong with you guys?

Now a days it’s common to be angry with the Muslim community due to all the wars and destruction going on in the world. I am not particularly Islamophobic as I have many good Muslim friends. However, I do have some concerns about them, which bothers me.

All my Muslim friends are against US or Israel and all the other countries which are trying to either steal their oil or land. My whole Facebook feed is usually filled with my Muslim friends showing either their anger against such countries or in solidatory with the victim countries. Many a times I also supported them where I can see that things are going wrong with them. But what I have recently observed that none of my Muslim friends say anything when a Muslim terrorist organization carries out a hideous crime. For example, all of my Muslim friends verbally say that they do not support what ISIS is doing, but I have not seen even a single post by them publicly condemning ISIS.

When I think about this behavior, then I think of an obvious question, when they are so active in condemning the countries which are supposedly suppressing them, then why don’t they stand against their own organizations which they themselves say is wrong? It can only mean that either they do not think that what organizations like ISIS or other such organizations are doing is wrong or they secretly support them as a mission towards fulfilling their religious agendas.

I was really surprised during the Charlie Hebdo terrorist attacks that all my Muslim friends were talking about that one Muslim security guard who died in the attack and none of them were bothered about the rest of the people. None of them even bother to condemn the terrorist group which carried out that massacre.

The reason the world is getting passive towards Muslims is that they do not show even slightly that they are not in support of the various theorists organizations running on the name of their religion. I am waiting for the day when any of my Muslim friends actually condemns these attacks openly.