One of my friends lashed on me yesterday on a joke which I cracked on him with words which he should have not used. I was baffled why is he talking to me like this for no big reason. It was a lame joke which anyone could take on him/her self happily. While he was being rude to me and saying things he reminded me of a past incident where I made fun of him and he got offended, but he never told me and kept bottled up for the right moment. He said rude words to me now because he wanted to make me realize how he felt that time
Quite often all of us do the same when we get offended by someone. Instead of standing up in front of them to say that we did not like what they said/did or we were hurt and felt unhappy, we bottle up our anger for the right moment to pay off. I felt very sad for myfirend that he had to do that because of me and I am really sorry that I didn’t realize that I was offending him before. But now when I think about it, I feel none of us need to be rude or bottle up our anger waiting for the right moment to tell others that we got offended once. To me, it’s being cowardly and not being courageous enough to speak about ones feeling.
I have learned from my bitter experience in the past that it’s always better to be upfront with people you interact with. If I like something about someone I try to go to him/her and say it and it is the same with if I do not like something that someone did or said to me, I try to make sure that I convey them myself in a polite and respectful manner. I do not feel right to bottle up my anger for later use, because it not only come out in a very ugly way but also it troubles me till it’s inside me. I also feel that my friendships give me the right to speak about my feelings openly and I do not need to be rude to them to let them know that I am not happy about something.